21 November, 2014

Her Highness.

My baby turned three last month.  In the days since her birthday, she's changed so much it's hard for me to remember what it was like when she couldn't talk... *lol*

For instance, this morning in her sleep Madam verbally accosted me with "look what you did to my back!" and violently rolled over, yanking the duvet up over her head.  I found a hat I liked in TK Maxx last week, so I tried it on and asked her what she thought of it.  Cue deadpan face and the assertion that I couldn't buy that hat.  When I asked why, I was informed that I was too old.  This led to a ten minute showdown in the accessories section during which she repeatedly took the hat from me and hung it back on the wall with the reiteration that I was too old to buy that hat.  When she's really mad at me, she says "you t-shirt not perfect."  Shades of a certain Auntie that's a bit of a fashionista... you know who you are.

The party was, as per our usual, a total blast.  House teeming with friends, table teeming with food, yard teeming with overexcited and sugared up children.  Perfection.  I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

 That's a happy girlie at the end of a very successful birthday party.  Mission accomplished, to be repeated next year.

13 November, 2014

Separation lack of anxiety.

There are things I've meant to blog about (like Madam's most epic party) and haven't gotten around to posting yet.  They're going to have to wait.

It doesn't happen very often, but sometimes I'm reminded of how much I changed the game by moving five thousand miles away from my family.  I still refer to Texas as home sometimes, like "we're going home for Christmas".  Thing is, I don't really mean it.  Yes, there are people in the states that I care about.  Yes, that's where I spent the first twenty-three years of my life, and I've maintained a few friendships from that time.  It just seems foreign and far away at times.

My life has had such a drastic shift in focus in the eleven years since the move.  Some changes I could have predicted.  Some have been way out of left field.  Relationships have evolved, imploded, matured or stagnated on a case by case basis.  On the whole, I'm happier for it.

I've had to physically take myself by the scruff of the neck lately.  My "no drama" policy has been pretty easy to maintain, on the whole.  The internet makes it hard not to get involved on occasion.  More than once I've started typing a comment or retort, thought "do I want to deal with the fallout on this?" and backspaced right back out of it.

What I have to remind myself is that the people who matter are the ones that give and take in equal proportions, people who are positive influences on my mindset and my way of life.  The people who get in touch more often than just when they want something.  If I have to chase you to keep our relationship afloat, it's just not going to work out.  I don't have the time, the energy, or the will to do so.  The people who love me make it known, and I hope I do the same for the people I love.  That's what I choose to focus on.  I want to be the healthy and happy version of me.  I think I'm on my way there.